Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
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