Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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