i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize