ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
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