just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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