hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
This beer is not sobering me up at all
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
