She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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