He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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