He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
