Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
Too much gin, very little bucket
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize