I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
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