He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize
