We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
