don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Randomize
