She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
