he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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