just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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