nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize