He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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