I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Randomize
