How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
Randomize
