Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Randomize
