If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Text me some of your sweat
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Randomize
