Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
