it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
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