I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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