Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
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