just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Randomize
