I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
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