you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Randomize
