i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
