So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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