we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
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