I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize
