Your face is a jimmy john
Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
I need a burrito and a hug.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Randomize
