i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Randomize
