Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I just want to make out with him forever
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
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