i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
Randomize
