All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
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