We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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