I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize
