that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
