It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
Randomize
