yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
