I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
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