no you cant smoke seaweed
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
