Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize