she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
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