Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
grandma shit on top of the toilet
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
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