Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
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